Monday Movie Review: Conan the Barbarian 3D

Rating: ** / 5

When I first saw that there was a Conan movie coming out, I got all excited thinking the Conan O’Brien documentary that premiered at SxSW was actually a 3D feature film.. Alas, no such luck. Conan the Barbarian 3D is a remake of the 80s movie staring Arnold Schwarzenegger. What? A remake you say? It’s almost hard to believe in a movie industry so full of original content..

So what does the movie poster lead us to expect? Well, death certainly. Lots and lots of death. Everything in the poster is high contrast, exaggerated to the point of looking strange.. It seems the main goal of this poster is to remind you that it is a 3D movie. And because of this,  I anticipate a lot severed heads, blood splattering and skulls flying across the screen.

The colors remind me a lot of The Mummy poster from years back. In fact, this movie looks a mixture of every 3D action movie of the last while: 300, Prince of Persia, … I’d say it’ll be incredibly cheesy, everyone will be half naked and there will be very little story. See it with a big group and sneak rum into your cinema Coke.

Never forget…

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